We’ve all been there at some point in our lives. Some of us, can get over it quite easily while the rest of us, are subject to one of the most annoying emotions ever, at a rather irksome frequency. It’s natural to have this emotion once in a blue moon. Of course, like anything, too much of it, and it turns into a problem. To stop any problem we must first know what it is. So, what is jealousy exactly?
Jealousy is an emotion that:
1. Comes from distrust in yourself or in others.
2. Can affect any relationship in your life, not just sexual ones.
3. Can be a solution.
Now, when I said it’s a solution, I never meant that it was a well, thought out solution. Jealousy is a rash solution we turn to when we feel vulnerable and can think of no better options at the time. Instead of competing for attention or letting your jealousy build up until you’re projecting harsh words of anger, Clinical Psychologist, Susan Heitler, has a better idea:
I invite my client, “Close your eyes.” Closed eyes enable people to focus inward.
I ask then the forward-looking question, “If you look at your jealousy in the best possible light, what is the jealousy intended to accomplish?”
Once we know what concern the “solution” of jealousy is meant to address, we can work together to create new options for solving the problem.
To conquer jealousy, we have to think of it not as an overwhelming emotion, but as a simple mistake that we can correct. And if we take Dr. Heitler’s advice, we are still capable of getting what we truly want out of our mistakes.
According to the New York Times, modern television can be beneficial. (Shocking, I know. If you don’t believe me, I’ll provide a link to this article at the end of this post. Warning, it’s a bit lengthy.) Basically, the article states that today’s shows are much more intricate than in previous decades; and because of a more thought provoking plot, we engage more parts of our brain, using it more frequently, thus, making us smarter. The article is from 2005, but considering it claims more modern TV shows have more complexity, the article should logically increase in validity as television evolves. So, how does this claim consider the awful reality TV and other such nonsense we are subjected to? Well, even though some shows that are around today are still rather simple (to say the least), they are still packed with more information than most shows back then. Today,”You have to focus to follow the plot, and in focusing you’re exercising the parts of your brain that map social networks, that fill in missing information, that connect multiple narrative threads.”. So, while this isn’t necessarily proven, it does make quite a bit of sense that TV, in some way, can make you smarter (or at the very lest, make you use your brain more often). So who’s going to run to their mom screaming that she lied to you and television won’t rot your brain?
PS – If you do read the article, I’d love to hear your opinion on it 🙂 Especially the last section “The Rewards of Smart Culture” Is our culture becoming more intelligent?
NY TIMES ARTICLE
The Kinsey Scale, for those of you who do not know, is a scale that was invented in 1948 that was designed to attempt to explain an individual’s sexual orientation at a given time. Rather than labels like heterosexual,homosexual, and bisexual, the scale rates you 0-6. (0 being 100% heterosexual while 6 represents 100% homosexual) If you’re curious as to where you may rest on this scale, here’s a link to a site that developed a test to assess your possible position on it. http://vistriai.com/kinseyscaletest/
WARNING! Loads of opinion is in the rest of this post!
Fear is just another emotion that is a part of life. If we did not have fear we would either die doing something stupid, or never really live to begin with. After all, what is living without the knowledge of risk? However, when that fear is crippling and all consuming or even when that fear just interrupts your daily life, it is a problem. Here’s how to overcome fear in 4 steps:
Psychologists have realized that a person’s preference in music can often lead to a fairly accurate prediction of their personality. Often your favorite music style gives away your own style and attitude. This chart compares 13 different types of music and the characteristics their listeners commonly share. The similarities between two music genres mean an increased likelihood of similar enthusiasts as well. For instance, soul and blues listeners produced the same results while rock and classical fans proved to have very opposing characteristics. Continue reading